“Once I’m Established”

The phrase “once I’m established” is my favorite thing to say when I imagine my successful, adult future. For some time I’ve kept a poorly organized mental list in my head of all the things I hope to do the second I become a stable, functioning member of society. They go beyond the normal “I want to decorate my own home” type of ideas. Although they aren’t even that impressive lol. I think most people have nice, reliable cars (see item 8). These will be the things that prove that I have finally entered the true adult life:

  1. Own a garage and park my car inside (not having my own home means I’m the extra car that parks on the street)
  2. Enroll in pole dancing classes (fitness classes will mean I have extra money to spend, plus I’ll gain extra street cred for being able to pole dance)
  3. Actually pay for a Netflix account (as I currently mooch of my mom’s).
  4. Sleep in a new, nice, expensive mattress (The day I move out permanently, is the day I buy myself the most prestigious mattress I can afford).
  5. Have a room dedicated as a library (being established must mean that I have accumulated a mass amount of literature in my journey to adulthood.)
  6. Grow avocado trees in my backyard (I just really like avocados and really dislike their priciness)
  7. Teach my kids Spanish (as a prospering adult I surely have perfected my own Spanish skills, bagged a man, and yielded children to educate.)
  8. Own a reliable, fairly new car that doesn’t have multiple issues or embarrassments.
  9. Have a shit ton of shoes, just because I love shoes.
  10. Chop off all my hair. I have this idea that as an established adult who is happy and confident, I will no longer feel the need to have hair on my head lol.

Keeping a list like this, keeps things fun for me. They’re little things to look forward to and I’m definitely interested in how many I’ll actually be able to check mark.

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